You are your own best coaching tool. Watch yourself closely when coaching your child reading, writing, and maths skills becomes difficult and you feel frustrated. The usual trap is to think that they are the one who is reluctant to coach with you, not paying enough attention, or not remembering the work fast enough. Blame of another, or seeing the other as the problem is quite a normal reaction but not a helpful one, especially when you are coaching your child.
When you realise that you are both experiencing a difficult situation that needs resolving then all the hot emotions can dissipate, all the blame can disappear, and solutions will gradually present themselves. Our children are skilled observers of our every intonation, word, silence, or facial expression, and our responses can positively or negatively affect their beliefs in themselves right into adulthood.
If you believe that they are keen learners and intelligent students, they are likely over time to deeply believe that. In fact, believing the best of your child, even when their current actions during coaching belie those beliefs, is a deeply respectful and positive action that will serve you and them well all their lives. When you change how you feel, think and act towards them, the nature of the coaching changes, and so do your child’s responses to it. I suggest lots of strategies in my posts and in my guide on ‘How to coach your children to be excellent students’ that you can use to change coaching of your child’s learning so it remains respectful, effective, and fun.
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Families as Coaches 
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